Red, pink and all things similar have shrouded the celebrations of 14th February as the day the world gestures a profound emotion we are all yet to decipher.
While throughout the year the colour red is considered synonymous with the countless massacres of innocent souls, it is only during the month of February that red is associated with a celebration that makes us forget our misadventures. Shops, malls and eateries bathed in red to attract love birds for manifesting their feelings deep in the recesses of their hearts.
Nevertheless, the history of Valentine's Day and the story of its patron saint are commemorated every year to honour his sacrifice. And as we know that February has long been celebrated as a month of romance containing vestiges of both Christian and ancient Roman tradition, in our part of the world, where socio-cultural norms set certain limitations on the exploration of this endeavour, the day has become more of a celebration of love than romance – an obscure distinction for those struck by the arrows of Cupid.
The desire for love is deeply rooted in our psychological makeup. Books abound on the subject. Television and radio talk shows deal with it; the internet is full of advice. So are our parents and friends. Keeping love alive in our relationships is a serious business and yet with all the help from experts, why is it that so few seem to have found the secret to keeping love alive in our lives?
The answer to this lies in a simple explanation – the expression of this feeling. People express love in the most profound ways, they buy gifts and other materialistic objects to translate their feelings of affection for those they adore, do something their loved ones cherish, to bring happiness to their faces, or an act of kindness, a gesture, no matter how trivial, just to emanate their emotions. This is what bonds people, forges new relationships and mends broken ones – the key is speaking the language of love.
Any relationship is like the sea, sometimes the sailing is smooth, other times it’s rough. An experienced mermaid can look at a beautiful day, feel a particular dullness in her scaly tail and sense that a storm is coming. A typhoon builds slowly and steadily, providing prior notice to batten down your hatches. What then ensues is never pleasant for any one. The same metaphorical spectre implies on to human relationships, a situation like this it is imperative to steer the relationship to a constructive direction by channelling positive thoughts. And what can be a better excuse that the day of love itself. Get out of your egotistical bubble and do what the occasion demands.
Shifting over to the 14th February celebrations, in recent times, the cultural shift and the influence of the media has shed ambiguity on the distinction between love and romance. While we in Pakistan should observe it as a day to express love, popular culture has reduced it to an amorous, frisky trend for the young and beautiful.
Take a stroll in the park on any given Sunday, and observe – families, couples, kids all enjoying their time, and the company they have, what lies in the middle of all that is love, the feeling they have for those they care for. Should the façade of the Valentine’s Day be just about two love birds, no! Love is beyond all that.
A 2012 Google report cites a three -word query – ‘what is love?’ as the single most searched question in that year. It is a question that civilisations have struggled to answer from the beginning of time, inspiring everyone from Shakespeare to Shakira, long before the age of the internet.
Judging from pop culture, love can be a many-splendored thing, but stripping away all the romance, scientists say that it only takes a second to fall in love, setting forth a cascade of reactions inside the brain. Whatever the case might be – no one cares about the maneuverings and essence of the feeling, but, the expression of et al.
After all, love is not love, if its not expressed.
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